I'm the ONLY Black person in class: My FIRST of THIRTY days of Yoga

I arrived early; as in two hours early. I got the time mixed up and showed up at 9:00, instead of the correct time for my FIRST time committing to a yoga practice. I chose Bhakti yoga.  While waiting, an older gentleman, by the name of Sean approached me and informed me that the New year class celebration wouldn't begin until 11:00 a.m. This meant, I had a near 2-hour wait. I decided to head over to the beach for my New Year's day burning the old and burying it into the sand ritual. Sean informed me that today's yoga class was a special class where they would be performing 108 Sun Salutation poses. It was as if he was speaking a foreign language to me. Based on my facial expression, he could tell I had no clue what a sun salutation was.

I returned around 10:20; as I figured the class would be full of regular yogis clamoring for a space on the floor nearest the instructor or  holding a space for their friends. I just wanted a space  in the back of the room; so that I could look at everyone in front of me to ensure that I was somewhere in the ball park with my yoga poses. I walk into a beautifully painted space and made my way towards this elephant like statue. Who knows why I decided to set up shop next to this beautiful; yet strange looking statue with arms swinging every which way. Based on the flowers, beads and candles sitting atop of the statue, I figured it to be some sort of alter. Thanks to the owner and the yoga teacher,  a caucasian dude with blonde locs in his hair: Govind Das, I would leave the class having somewhat of an understanding of the importance of this magnificent piece of art work.

After Govind visually and audibally explained  what the sun salutation pose was, my body started to heat up all over. I wanted to run out of the door, but I was afraid of tripping over the ten mats in my way. What had I gotten myself into? We were going to be doing this same pose at various paces ONE HUNDRED and EIGHT TIMES over and over and over. Apparently 108 is a significant number in the yogi world. Had I situated my mat closer to the door, I would've left. I'm serious. I'm not advanced in yoga. Not to mention,   I have a super tight hamstring. I was scared. That's when I realized why I was there and why I was making this 30-day in a row commitment to a yoga practice.

WHY Yoga and WHY Yoga NOW?

.  It's an innate feeling that it's good for me on a spiritual level
.  It will help break down the scar tissue I've developed post fibroid tumor surgery & procedures
.  To surrender to the loud noise in my head that I can't hear when I run or lift weights
.  To improve my flexibility and core strength
.  What I resist PERSISTS
.  My heart wants to Open

I wanted to leap into the air at the end when I realized I completed ALL 108 sun salutations. That's when I realized this journey that I am on is NOT about that. It's NOT about how many poses you can twist your body into. It's NOT about how long you can hold a pose. It's really about connecting the breath with the intention and the commitment. I made a commitment the end of 2013 that I would figure out, within myself, what my RESISTANCE to yoga is really about. I've been blaming it on the fact that THOSE yoga people are ALL clickish with their hard tail yoga pants and that way most of them speak from their throats and not their diaphragm. I know! I know! I can be so judgmental. lol.  Not to mention, the fact that I'm typically the ONLY person of color. Hum! Could the fact that I live in Homogenous Santa Monica have anything to do with that??

Well, day ONE of my 30-days in a row at Bhakti was a little different, to say the least. The owner/instructor Govind was:

.  Genuine

.  Kind

.  Inviting

.  Heart Felt and Warm

Several women actually smiled at me via an eye wink. One woman, who had moved my mat nearer to the wall by the time I'd return from posting on instagram, actually acknowledged that she moved my mat and apologized for the inconvenience. Again, I wanted to run. I thought I was being punked by Ashton Kutcher. WTFreak was going on and what's wrong with these people. While in a couple of the movements, I did experience discomfort, tightness a few sharp pangs in my navel area; however, I resisted what was persisting in my body. At the end of the class, two women applauded my completion and encouraged me to stay for the lying on the mat with your eyes closed part of the class. Again, I wanted out. I wanted to leave. I felt myself rushing and I had absolutely nothing to do for the rest  of the day. I had already put my borrowed mat back on the shelf and had my back pack in tow. I relented and stayed. WOW! I'm grateful that I did.

The near 2 hour class eded with chanting words...phrases I have no idea what it was, but it didn't feel like I was worshipping the devil, so I joined it. We danced, raised our hands to our creator. We collectively acknowledged and solitude GOD and  ourselves in 2015.  Drums were playing to our movements and it was quite beautiful. I don't know; as of yet, if Bhakti will be my final home of yoga practice, but it's definitely a good place to start. I plan to take day TWO of 30-days in a row tomorrow morning at 7:00 am. God help me. lol Am I turning into a yogi?

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